I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
