Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
My ass is underappreciated
Randomize