He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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