is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
