y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize