hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
