I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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