Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
