i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
