well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
