I puked a lego.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
