I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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