MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
