just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
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