I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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