but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
