it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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