We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
