I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
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Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
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And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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