Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
