I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Randomize
