My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
