some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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