guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
You dont lie about slip and slides
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
