I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
