Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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