Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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