Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
