You really coming over, don't trick.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
he thought i was a dude.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
