Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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