you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize