I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
