Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
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i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
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I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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