We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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