how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
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All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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