This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
