I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
