Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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