I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize