The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
