Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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