If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize