did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize