So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
