I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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