It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
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