PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
