i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
