Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
my liver is dry heaving
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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