HIV tests are more positive than that guy
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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